Thursday, August 23, 2007

Whats up with my baby?


I've created a monster. When Cade was born I slept with him, which I think we both enjoyed (although I can't say I slept well). By about 3 months he was in the bassinet and at 4.5 months he was in the crib. He slept ok in the crib (fell asleep around 7:30 p.m. and stayed there for about 8 hours with feedings) and then he came to bed with me. I liked this arrangement because we still got our cuddle time but I also got a bit of sleep. About three weeks ago he decided he doesn't like the crib. He cries and cries when he wakes up there and calms down as soon as we pick him up. He wants to sleep with mommy! The crying spells happen about every 1-2 hours, on a good night. We have persevered and put him in the crib again and again...until about 2 in the morning, when I just can't take it anymore. I'm TOO tired!

I've heard it all: "you've got him in these bad sleep habits and you need to change it", " let him cry it out" and finally what I needed to hear" he is your baby, your the mom, you do whats right for you because you need to sleep". This last comment came on the cusp of my pending insanity. I am SO tired of the "let the baby cry it out" suggestion. I'm not letting my baby cry it out. If that works for you-GREAT, its not happening in this house. I've tried the warm bath before bed, books, cuddles, putting him to bed awake (yeah that went well) etc. I know he is manipulating me (in the sense that he now knows crying will get my attention) but I don't care.

Whats with this culture of extreme independence? I'm all about the attachment parenting model, with my own modifications. Like I said he is 6 months old, if he needs his mom, then he needs him mom, period. So my new plan is put him in his crib as much as possible while I am awake (and he is sleeping), and when he wakes up, while I slumber, bring him to bed. If he needs "sleep training" I'll consider that at a later date.

Any of you experiencing not only unsolicted advice, but repeated unsolicited advice? The same things over and over? So what if I've created a monster? I'm not clear on why other people feel the need to tell me how to mother my child. If I ever do this to you, tell me to SHUT UP-its none of my business. How was that for a rant? I feel better now...

3 Comments:

Anonymous bitetherabbit said...

Good rant and good for you for listening to your mothering instincts! If it makes you feel better, H (13 months old) still comes into our bed from about 5am until we get out of bed. You need to do what's right for you AND your baby! CIO is hard and is basically training YOU to ignore your baby. Have you tried sending Tyler in to resettle Cade down? It worked for us. H still gets up a few times a night but I'm fine with it. For now.

It could be teeth or he misses you. Awwww!

August 24, 2007 at 9:43 AM  
Blogger Kristian (Shantelle) said...

Yeah, I'm just not ok with that! Tyler has tried several times and it makes no difference. As soon as he hands him over to me he passes out.

August 24, 2007 at 11:01 AM  
Blogger heather said...

I'm with you guys. You have to do what works for you and you know your baby best. And who calls him a monster? With that sweet little face and those edible little toes? No way!

August 24, 2007 at 3:46 PM  

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